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Hand in the Dark

by Nighttime

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1.
Wait for me, haunt me in my dreams Waste all you see, waking each day for sleep Waking each day to sleep, sleeping each night to dream See me through till spring, as evenings wax in light Stand by me, so I can stand to fight On my own again this time --I’m alone again this time On my own again this time --I’m alone again this time Meet me in between the roses and the vine Share with me the sacrificial wine --Here’s to what used to be --Here’s to the passing time --Here’s to the dying earth And here’s to you and I, apart for the rest of life
2.
I looked across the divide And I found the otherside And I told a lie I told you a lie I told you a lie I told you a lie I told you a lie I knew that I had tried And I saw that I was blind And I knew that I had to try to find What was on the other side On the other side On the other side On the other side I knew that I had to try to find what was on the other side on the other side And I knew that I had become blind to what I would find what I would find I knew that I had to try to find what was on the other side on the other side And I knew that I had become blind to what I would find what I would find
3.
My sister took me down to the riverside Buried me in the ground so I would have to find What I looked like What I will look like And what I look like Take me down to winter streams paused Take me around death under frost Bury me in the ground, like love that has been lost Like love there is no cost--but that is of course the cost Take me down so I can find what it is that I can’t leave behind That haunts my waking mind and fills my dreams every night You gave me death as you gave me life So I’ll bring you from the depths and we’ll wield our butchers knives And draw in the sand a line --you will take one side, and I will take one side See me in the light, see me eye to eye See me in the light, see me eye to eye
4.
I woke up all at once from a dark deep sleep Thoughtless, formless, washing, washing, rinsing over me Please soft heart, please soft heart Ease my heart, leave my heart Please soft heart, please soft heart Ease my heart, release my heart Then I rose, following your memory From the third story window to the garden beneath Through the gate, through the street Through the waves to the darkness beneath Please soft heart, please soft heart Ease my heart, cease my heart Please soft heart, please soft heart Ease my heart, release my heart To be what I am; to see what I can To always look forward and only turn back To be as I am; to see as I can To only move forward and never move back
5.
Night after night after night, until the light A point of conscience where all can be destroyed And all then can rejoice Night after night after night, until the light Night after night after night, two cities float Pinpoints of light Two cities, burning flames of life Through the day and through the night And in my heart two cities align, all which I cannot define Drive through the mountains in the summertime I will leave you with this in mind I will leave you with this in mind, I will live with this in mind I will leave you with this in mind, I will live with this in mind Drive through the mountains in the earliest light I will leave this with you in mind Night after night after night, until the light A point of conscience where all has been destroyed But still I cannot rejoice
6.
I have searched a long time and I have looked my whole life And I have finally found something that feels right We stayed up all night, we stayed up all night Down by the river in earliest light We stayed up all night, we stayed up all night Down by the river in late July Down winding roads our lives follow Summer crickets winter swallows Never held only followed Always tasted never swallowed We stayed up all night, we stayed up all night Down by the river in earliest light We stayed up all night, we stayed up all night Down by the river in late July
7.
Stone Fruit 04:49
I held on, onto it all at once And I held on, followed until it was gone Falling, falling for you And calling, through the night for you Following through the woods With all the direction that I could find To fight long and hard And I learned it-- I learned it with heart And I earned it-- though it was hard But I ended up with what I had at the start was lost, it was lost, it was lost Lost, it was lost, it was lost Lost, it was lost, it was lost Lost, it was lost, it was lost And I burned down the house, sent the pets away And I forgot how to wake with the sun and stay up through the day --and I lost all I found, lost all I knew For all I knew was bound Through my heart and you And I burned, I burned so true And I burn, I burn so true But I was lost, I was lost, I was lost Lost, it was lost, it was lost Lost, it was lost, it was lost Lost, it was lost, it was lost
8.
Sunrise 03:54
I watched the day die with the sunrise And I watched each lover blind But it was me who lost my sight Second only to time we’re buried under sky And all that’s past we’re searching for When all that’s left we’re yet to find What is it we’ve lost, and what is now lost beyond All it is we’ve come across and all that we believe is gone?
9.
Hey little one, stay out til the sun And I’ll be there to hold you when the day is done Trials will face you, but there is only one Way that I will see you through the eyes of love To fill a bed with dreams I have tried more than a few For years I walked the streets to fill the loss of you And always it’s escaped me, each time I thought i knew What it means to love and what love is meant to do And always it’s escaped me, each time I thought I knew What it was you’ve given me and what I gave to you
10.
Will I ever find the peace of mind I felt amongst the trees or by the oceanside? In summer’s sun, or in winter’s blood I have found a way to drown my heart with love I’ve tried every day, and I have found a way To free the part of my mind that refused to change --but there still are many dark days, even without chains I have still held myself a slave While in the brightest light I still have felt the night, In the darkest times I have felt the light shine While in the brightest light I still have felt the night, In the dark of night, I still have known the light

credits

released October 12, 2018

Hand in the Dark was written, produced & performed by Eva Louise Goodman.

All songs were engineered, mixed and mastered by Robert Ferbrache.

Photography and design by Grayling Bauer.

© 2018 Black Meadow

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